I Posted About Ghosting Wedding Suppliers… and Apparently We Have Opinions 😂

A few days ago, I shared a fairly light-hearted post in a few wedding groups about something most wedding suppliers will have experienced at some point: being ghosted after an enquiry.

I genuinely didn’t expect much from it.

A few likes, perhaps a couple of photographers agreeing with me, and we'd all carry on with our day.

Instead, it reached thousands of people, was shared, and started quite the conversation between photographers, florists, bakers, musicians, celebrants, other wedding suppliers and couples themselves.

And apparently, we have very different opinions on this one.

Some suppliers completely agreed. Others said they would actually rather not receive an email telling them somebody had chosen someone else. Some felt that suppliers simply need to be less sensitive about rejection.

And you know what? I can understand both sides.

But I also think there’s a bigger conversation here about what actually happens behind a wedding enquiry — and about communication on both sides.

First things first: I don't expect every enquiry to become a booking

Not even slightly.

When you’re planning a wedding, you should shop around.

Photography in particular is incredibly personal. You might love somebody's photographs but not connect with their approach. You might find someone whose editing style feels more like you. Your budget might change. Another photographer might offer something you particularly want.

Or you might simply find somebody and think, yep, that's our person.

The same goes for your florist, cake designer, musician, celebrant and every other person involved in your wedding.

We're not going to be the right fit for everybody.

And that's a good thing

So… do you actually need to tell a wedding supplier you've chosen somebody else?

Technically? No.

There were suppliers commenting on my original post who said exactly that. An initial enquiry is essentially window shopping, and they don't particularly want an inbox full of emails saying, "Sorry, we've booked somebody else."

I actually thought that was an interesting perspective.

But lots of us felt differently — particularly when an enquiry has involved more than simply sending across a price list.

For some wedding suppliers, a quote can involve researching venues, discussing ideas, creating bespoke packages, sketching designs, working out quantities, checking travel and availability or going backwards and forwards answering questions.

Florists and cake designers in particular pointed out just how much work can sometimes happen before anything has even been booked.

As a photographer, I might have spent time talking through your wedding plans, explaining which collection would work with your timeline, checking locations and answering questions.

Nobody is suggesting couples owe us a booking because we've done that.

But after a conversation, a tiny "Thank you so much, we've decided to go in another direction" really is appreciated.

It takes less than a minute.

And strangely enough, it can genuinely make our day simply knowing either way.

You never need to tell me why

This is probably the most important part.

You don't owe me an explanation.

You don't have to tell me another photographer was cheaper.

You don't have to explain that your mum preferred somebody else's photographs.

You don't have to justify your budget.

You don't even have to tell me who you've booked.

A simple:

"Thank you so much for your help. We've decided to go with somebody else, but really appreciate your time."

is absolutely plenty.

There are genuinely no hard feelings.



I'll wish you the most wonderful wedding and carry on with my day.

And suppliers need to make saying “no thank you” comfortable too

This was another side of the conversation that I thought was really important.

A few people said they had politely told wedding suppliers they were going elsewhere, only to receive replies trying to change their mind.

"Oh, that's such a shame!"

"Can I ask why?"

"Was it the price?"

Or worse, immediately offering discounts and trying to convince them to reconsider.

And yeah... I don't love that either.

If we ask people to communicate with us, we also have a responsibility to make that communication comfortable.

If you tell me you've chosen another photographer, I'm not going to interrogate you, make you feel guilty or suddenly start negotiating.

You made the right decision for your wedding.

Thank you for letting me know. 🤍

That's genuinely it.

There's also one very boring reason I love getting a reply...

Junk mail. 😂

The absolute bane of my life.

Quite a few of my initial enquiry responses seem to find their way into people's junk folders, despite my best efforts.

So when someone replies — even if that reply is a polite no — at least I know they actually received the information they asked me for.

Otherwise there's always that little question of:

Did they decide against me... or is my beautifully written email currently sitting between a Temu discount code and somebody claiming I've inherited £4 million?

We'll never know.

What if it was only a really quick enquiry?

This was probably the biggest grey area in the comments.

If you've messaged ten photographers asking for prices, they've sent you their standard brochure and there's been no further conversation, some suppliers genuinely aren't bothered about hearing back.

Fair enough.

But if you've had a conversation, asked questions, requested a bespoke quote, had a consultation, asked someone to put together ideas or they've prepared paperwork for you, I think a little message is a lovely courtesy.

Not because suppliers are emotionally devastated by losing a booking.

Simply because there's a human being running that business.

And this isn't really just about weddings

Although the original conversation was about wedding suppliers, the same applies to other service-based businesses too.

I photograph newborns, families and maternity sessions alongside weddings, and I feel exactly the same way about those enquiries.

You might enquire about newborn photography and then realise you'd prefer a traditional studio photographer.

You might love my family photography but decide it's outside your budget right now.

You might enquire with three photographers and simply connect more with another one.

That's completely normal.



Choosing a photographer is about far more than availability. You're choosing somebody whose work, approach, personality and price all need to feel right for you

The conclusion from hundreds of comments?

There isn't one. 😂

Some suppliers want the email.

Some would rather not receive it.

Some couples think replying is basic courtesy.

Others see an enquiry as exactly that — an enquiry, with no expectation of further communication.

But I think there was one useful takeaway from the whole slightly controversial conversation:

We're all human beings talking to other human beings.

Couples don't owe suppliers a booking.

Suppliers shouldn't make couples feel uncomfortable for choosing somebody else.

And when someone has spent time helping you, answering your questions or creating something specifically for your enquiry, a ten-second message saying "thank you, but we've gone another way" is a very lovely thing to do.

No explanation necessary.

No awkwardness.

No hard feelings.

And from this wedding photographer, at least, you'll always get a genuine wish that you have the most incredible day.

And if this blog has made you a little curious about me…

If you've somehow made it all the way to the end of a blog about ghosting wedding suppliers, firstly — thank you.

And secondly, if it's made you a little curious about my work, I'm Simona, the photographer behind Moments by Simona. I photograph weddings, newborns and families across Derbyshire, Leicestershire and the surrounding areas, with a natural, storytelling approach centred around real connection and all those little in-between moments.

If you're currently planning your wedding, looking for a photographer, or simply want to have a nosey at my work and see whether we might be the right fit, you can explore more below.

And don't worry — if you enquire and decide I'm not your person, I promise I can handle it.